Let’s be real—watching someone you love begin to show signs of dementia is hard. It sneaks up, sometimes slowly. Other times it can seem to occur all at once. You start to notice the little things: they can’t remember where they left their keys, forget your name for a moment, or ask the same question three times in ten minutes. It’s heartbreaking, frustrating, and honestly, kind of scary.
But there are ways to make life a little gentler—for them and for you.
Keep Things Familiar
Routine is one of the most underrated tools when it comes to supporting someone with memory loss. No need to create a military-style schedule—just aim for a predictable rhythm. Think: wake up, breakfast, light activity, rest, lunch, maybe a little TV, then dinner. Familiarity brings comfort. Simple routines can reduce anxiety and confusion, especially in the earlier stages.
One tip I’ve personally seen work? Use the same mug for coffee every morning. Something as small as that can quietly signal safety and normalcy.
Make The Home Work For Them
Their environment matters more than you might think. Remove tripping hazards like rugs. Add night lights for bathroom trips. Label drawers and cabinets—even if it feels silly. And don’t underestimate the magic of a giant wall calendar and a whiteboard for reminders.
According to the National Institute on Aging, these kinds of small adjustments can help keep people with dementia safer and more independent longer. That’s the goal, right?
Keep Conversations Simple—And Kind
When someone’s memory starts to slip, communication changes. It’s not about “talking down” to them—it’s about making it easier to follow.
Speak slowly. Use short sentences. Ask one question at a time. If they forget something, gently repeat it. If they start telling a story that doesn’t totally make sense? That’s okay. Sometimes it’s more important to listen than correct.
Little Joys Matter
This part’s easy to overlook when you’re overwhelmed—but don’t.
Play their favorite songs. Look through old photo albums. Bake something together, even if they can’t really help much. Give them something to do, even if it’s folding towels or “helping” you with dinner. People still need to feel useful.
If they’re part of an assisted living community, ask about group activities. Music therapy, low-impact exercise classes, even just a social hour with coffee can do wonders.
Don’t Go It Alone
This is not a solo job. Let yourself ask for help—whether that’s a sibling, a friend, or a local support group. You’re not weak for needing breaks. You’re human.
For support, resources, or just a place to breathe, the Alzheimer’s Association offers a free 24/7 helpline, plus local groups and tips that actually help.
Bottom line? Be patient—with them and with yourself. It’s not about fixing memory. It’s about showing up, again and again, with love. And some days, that’s more than enough.
